Welcome back. Catch up on Part 1 and Part 2 if you missed them.
Today we're talking about the longest game of the whole series: teaching Charlie to understand what's happening inside his own body.
I’m talking about tuning in to interoception (again). If you're a long time follower, you're probably an interoception expert by now. When we're talking about kids and emotional regulation (which is a very large proportion of the familes I serve), you can't not mention interoception.
If you're new here, interoception is one of the most important things we can teach kids about — especially neurodivergent kids who experience big sensations but don't always have the language or awareness to name what's happening.
Here’s the thing with Charlie: he doesn't love talking about his feelings. He finds breathing exercises "soooooo annoying". He's not going to sit down and fill out an emotion wheel. He's a math kid. A science kid. A podcast kid. He taught himself multiplication. He's really into data, not so much into the fluffy stuff.
His mom was phrasing this to me as a negative, but I actually thought this was perfect for the work I had in mind.
Introducing Interoception to Charlie
Let's start with the dashboard analogy.
Before any talk of feelings or regulation or emotions, we needed him to understand that his body is actually sending him signals.
Imagine a car's dashboard. Every light and symbol tells you something about what the car needs. If the gas light comes on and you ignore it, you run out of gas. If the tire pressure sensor is broken and you don't know it, you could be driving on a flat and not realize until the tire blows.
Your body works the same way. It has a dashboard too, except instead of lights, it uses sensations. Rumbly, gurgly tummies. A dry mouth. A pounding heart. Clammy hands. All of those are the dashboard telling you something about what the body needs.
The goal of this conversation isn't emotions yet. We just want Charlie to understand that our bodies are always sending us information. It's worth paying attention to.
Now comes the science and anatomy
Once that framework is in place, you go deeper into the biology.
Why does your heart beat faster when you run? It's pumping blood to your muscles so they can move fast. That's why after tag or gymnastics your heart is pounding. That's what it's for.
But your heart also beats fast when your brain detects something uncomfortable. Pain. Fear. Overwhelm. Even an eyelash stuck in your eye while you're driving (this happened to me recently and I was sweating, heart pounding, like — it's just an eyelash but my body did NOT care).
We want him to learn that his heart pounding is not something to fear, but something to listen to.
His mom had one of those Yoto boxes with body system cards — and there's already one on the nervous system. This was a perfect starting point. I also suggested they explore YouTube videos on how the heart works, how digestion happens, what the nervous system actually does.
Keep it factual. Keep it science-y. He will love this.
Now we bring in the external sensory piece
Noticing what's happening inside your body is harder than noticing what's happening externally, where it's visually and physically more tangible . So we start with the outside to build that awareness muscle.
I wanted him to try this experiment: Close his eyes. Hi mom would press the back of a pencil eraser gently to his knee. Can he tell where he felt it? Now try an ice cube. A feather. Different temperatures, different textures, different pressure levels.
The goal was to get him thinking about his body one part at a time.
Where did you feel that? What did it feel like? Can you describe it without just saying "cold"?
Then you move to movement. What does his head feel like after spinning? What does he notice in his hands during a downward dog and then right after? What happens in his tummy when he jumps on the trampoline?
This is all building toward the ability to do a body check-in when his nervous system is ramping up. Feet — what do you notice there? Shoulders — what do you notice there? Not "how do you feel" but what do you notice, and where do you feel it.
Then it's time to introduce the emotions
This is the slow part. The part that doesn't happen in a week or a month. But as he gets more practice localizing sensations in his body, his mom can start making connections in real time.
I noticed your face got really red just now. Did you feel anything in your face? Was it warm?
Over time, you build something like a cheat sheet.
- His face gets hot when he's frustrated.
- His hands get tight when he's overwhelmed.
- His heart pounds before he tips into the red zone.
And then — eventually — you can help him connect sensation to strategy. Hot face? Here's what we can do to cool it down.
The hope is that throughout the day (prior to the 4PM alert), his mom might be able to facilitate some regular body-based check ins, so he can be more in control of figuring out what his body needs, and actually getting that before it was too late.
His mom's killer ideas
She was thinking about getting him a Fitbit so he could literally see his heart rate in real time. Watch it go up when he's activated. Watch it go down as he slows his breathing.
For a math kid who loves data, seeing his heart rate drop from 110 to 98 while he takes deep breath would be compelling evidence. That is a number. That is cause and effect.
Such a good idea!
She also floated another idea: making a private "podcast" or video series where Charlie explains what he's learned — how the heart works, what interoception is, what his body does when it gets dysregulated. Teaching it back is one of the best ways to retain it. And for a kid who loves podcasts and feels like the expert on himself? That might just be the thing that makes this curriculum feel like his.
Next week: We're closing out Charlie's story with something his mom mentioned almost as an aside, but it ended up explaining a lot. If your child has ever dug their heels in the harder you pushed, you'll want to read this one.
Disclaimer: These case studies are inspired by real-life clients I have worked with, with permission from their parents to share. Some aspects of the case are authentic, and other details are added to include more variability for our discussions. None of the strategies and advice here substitutes medical advice, diagnosis or intervention with an Occupational Therapist.
Pssst... Idk if you heard, but on June 18th I'm hosting a webinar to help you tweak your screen-time routine so it doesn't always end in dysregulation and tears (from all parties involved!). Join us live for a chance to win a free gift, or catch the replay. All you gotta do is register by clicking the button below! Hope to see you there!
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