Owen was 4.5 when his parents reached out to me for coaching. They described him as “intellectually bright and emotionally younger than his years”, and they were trying to figure out which of his behaviors were sensory-motivated and which ones weren't. They also wanted strategies to help with anxiety, hygiene routines (a big one), and supporting him through new experiences like starting preschool.
Owen hadn't been formally evaluated, so everything his parents were noticing was based on their own observations at home. And as we know, parents are often the best observers of their kids. They just don't always have the language or framework to make sense of what they're seeing.
Here's what concerns they shared in our first conversation:
- Bath time was traumatic (they'd tried games, funny voices, letting him lead, all of it)
- Teeth brushing was a daily struggle
- Nail clipping felt impossible
- He was rigid about clothing (would only wear joggers and tees, refused underwear)
- Sleep anxiety and teeth grinding at night
- Big reactions to spontaneous sounds (the phone ringing, the baby's mobile)
- Frustration when he couldn't control his environment
- Generalized anxiety that seemed to be growing
Owen's sensory profile (based on parent observation):
- Highly sensitive to sound (his mom noted he seems to have perfect pitch)
- Wanted certain sounds to repeat in certain ways, and would melt down if they didn't sound right
- Struggled with touch sensitivity, especially splashes on his face or clothes
- Seemed to always be looking for opportunities to squeeze and push (heavy work), but sometimes it dysregulated him
My Initial Thoughts
The first thing that stood out to me was how much of Owen's behavior made sense when you zoomed out. His parents were describing a nervous system that seemed to be working overtime, constantly scanning his environment and reacting to input that most kids would filter out.
When a child has a highly tuned sensory system, particularly with sound, they're taking in way more information than their brain can comfortably organize. Imagine being at a party where every single conversation is the same volume and you can't tune any of them out. That's what some kids experience just walking through their own house. The fridge hum, the TV, a sibling's toy, someone munching on chips, the doorbell, all of it coming in at once with no filter.
So when Owen insisted that a sound repeat a certain way, or that a song not change, I suspected his brain was trying to create predictability in a world that felt unpredictable. It was a regulation strategy, even if it didn't look like one from the outside.
His hygiene battles also pointed to tactile sensory differences. His body experienced stress and overwhelm with things like: water on the face, textures of clothing, the feeling of a nail clipper near skin, the sound of an electric toothbrush.
And then there’s his rigidity around his environment. That's often what anxiety looks like in young kids with sensory sensitivities. They can't always say "I feel overwhelmed," so their body says it for them through control-seeking behavior.
Coming Up
Over the next three weeks, I'll walk you through the work we did with Owen and his parents. We'll cover:
- Why his need to control the environment was actually a nervous system strategy (and what we did instead of trying to "extinguish" it)
- How we used the Just Right Challenge approach to slowly help him feel less stressed during hygiene tasks
- How we taught Owen to become his own sensory detective using body-based awareness (including the wild scale he came up with himself)
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Disclaimer: These case studies are inspired by real-life clients I have worked with, with permission from their parents to share. Some aspects of the case are authentic, and other details are added to include more variability for our discussions. None of the strategies and advice here substitutes medical advice, diagnosis or intervention with an Occupational Therapist.
New to the world of sensory processing differences and don’t know where to start? I got you! My SPD 101 crash course for parents will catch you up to speed with the need-to-knows about sensory processing, including some strategies you can try today and which providers to work with for more targeted support.
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